Leaps of faith

Six years ago today, I moved at 21, on my own, to Istanbul, Turkey.

I stayed there for 5+ years, discovering a new culture, a new emotional ecosystem, a new language and religion. I experienced rejection, loss, danger, confusion, joy, thrill, food awe.

It opened my heart, made see a society that existed and felt warmer than my own. It gave me strength, I pushed myself to exist as a newbie for years, to have the humility of my own conditioning, « european coldness » and became the warm fiery heart of my childhood years.

If you don’t fit in with your own, remember the entire world exists. There’s a place for you somewhere. And that place might be temporary.

We often talk of dimensions, densities, energies: well that exists within cities, countries, heritage, you can hop on and off timelines by going somewhere else for longer than a few weeks.

The intensity of my experience abroad, whether when I lived in the UK or Turkey or the next country is what makes me feel alive, to shift, transform, deconstruct, adapt and construct.

This year I knew was the time to go home and pick up my own roots and work from France, it is a discovery on its own. I’m able to enjoy my country from an outsider’s perspective.

I will be on the edge of things, always an outsider, nationally, galactically, emotionally. Always.

Reaching for the new, expanding my comfort zone.

Anyways, shout out to 2014, June 15th, and to my courage. I remember the first night walking with my luggage in unlit streets, unpaved streets in a really bad side of town. Being scared but deciding to find my rented flat in a language I can’t make out yet.

And every single day from hereon wasn’t easy & yet was incredible.

I can’t wait for borders to open, for Covid to swiftly be contained and for a flight, kazandibi by the sea, for hugging my friends.